it was the worst sex ever in the history of sex. i mean ever. and he thought he was great. actually told me he was the best id ever had...what was i supposed to say? lol...i've had better times by myself. seriously.
Dude, I just woke up on the floor of some random chick's floor with puke in my hair and a posted note on my forehead that said "It's over." Dude I wasn't even aware I was in a relationship...
so im watching realhousewives of jersey with my mom. she just said they werent really rich bc they were doing their own makeup.
just throwing this out there: period starts tomorrow sooo either sex tonight or not until tues/weds.
i get a bj anyways so it's really your choice.
k i'll be over in 5.
We need to either start getting drunk more often or one of us need to start doin drugs
Wtf? Why?
I want awesome conversations to show the world.
i have my own cum on my nose right now. don't talk to me about "embarrassed".
moving back to school this early was a terrible idea we already used up our bail fund
Ok... I'm a little jealous... Grab her pig tails and ride her like a jet ski. Making motor noises is optional.
Received a verbal warning at work for "riding in a trash receptacle, violating professionalism & infection control."
Going to the beach. Greeting Sandy with a blunt. Wish us luck!
I hope our bodies realize that workaholics starts tomorrow and will be well enough to handle the hell we are going to put them through. amen.
We had sex during an intermission, then the second period. The bruins better win. Missing a period isn't worth having sex with him
So some drunk guy just tried to convince me with all of his passion that bacon is a color
That awkward moment when you are on your way to ICU and the only sympathy gift you can think of is beer and whiskey
He's got that kind of dick that just MAKES me cheat on my boyfriend. It deserves a trophy. Really you should give it ride sometime.
Randomize
