I remember having a drink with vegetables in it. They said it was a mojito, but it tasted like cabbage.
haha i love mojitos
ya and i hate cabbage
well my last 2 orgasms were over shoe sales at macy's. what does that tell you?
I'm jammin out to some Brit Birt, she's still my bitch, I love her crazy ass
dipping my christmas cookies in kaluha. santa would be proud.
See, not all bad decisions involve my penis.
He threw up the X he took like 30min before then when we thought his antics were over... BOOM! He tried to pee out a light he was holding.
Right now I'm standing in front of my fridge, drinking wine out of the bottle and eating cold steak with my hands. I am THE BEST at being single.
All those movies are bullshit, there is no way to run down a line of parked cars, they`re too far apart. my faces hurts so much right now
Good. Go forth, young stallion. Destroy the vaginal region with your tidy crotch.
I've never been to an orgy, but I would assume nachos wouldn't be out of the question at one.
I can't. I mean he's hot, but there's really nothing else there
You just said he's hot
NO YOU DON'T UNDERSTAND
NO FUCKBOY SHALL PASS OPERATION #BITCHMODE HAS SUCCEEDED
I passed out with the lights and tv on woke up at 4am SO confused and covered in goldfish so I ate them and went back to bed.. fuck xanax
When the people downstairs start talking about drugs, I second guess buying my drugs from them. Then I remember they are cheap and convenient.
My house exploded and with it all my pot went up in smoke.
Randomize
