oh god the rape fog is back!
Fuck 8am classes
Dear Jesus I'm gonna throw up through my eyes
I want a meaningful relationship and i wont get one if i keep giving him blow jobs in my basement while watching family guy.
You are in charge of making sure that her vagina explodes with joy tonight.
she left with her roommate. or at least i think she did. but i also just thought i ate candy corn but i'm hal convinced it was candle wax.
Ive never seen him vulnerable before. He just had surgery and looked so cute on his crutches. like a little baby bird with a broken wing. that i wanted to nurse back to health. with my vagina
So somebody asked her is she's okay.She turned around,started running and screamed "Ballet is running through my veins" before doing a small pirouette.It's amazing how she managed not to fall.
We had fun with our Indiana Jones role-playing until I whipped myself in the dick with my belt.
Got home last night and found a Big Mac in the shower, tampons all over the place, and two pairs of your panties on the front porch.
no, I didn't go in the end. Too hungover and hot, plus Star Wars is on so obviously I'm having a naked day.
He Dutch ovened me while I was hiding under the covers from his mom. Needless to say it did not end well.
Hooked up with a straight guy while dressed as a man. I'm unstoppable.
Any idea why my ass cheeks are bruised again?
The fact that theyre bruised AGAIN means you're not adult enough to know why.
I'm a little concerned about right now. You showed up at my house soaking wet, drunk with a bag of ham and 2 liter of Dr. Pepper, and you refused to tell me where you got the ham until I gave you some more liquor.
You texted me a picture of some random naked guy. Did you lose your virginity?
Randomize
