I just walked into a tree. I think it's time to go home.
Is showing up wearing the condom a bit presumptus
the best part about tonight...knowing when i wake up in the morning his car will still be full of packing peanuts..and mine wont
I'm like a new puppy, everybody wants to touch me
I told him to go down on me and when he did he started crying!! I asked him why and he said my vag looked just like his ex girlfriends!!!
he just tried to lick my eyebrow. thats the deal breaker.
i dont even know how to be here
all I heard when I woke up this morning was "BONG HITS FOR BREAKFAST" being yelled repeatedly.
thanks for carrying me to bed.. and sorry for trying to roll down the hallway to escape.
All is not lost. The bondage chair came with repair seals and glue. It's like the knewwwwwww this would happen.
I don't even know. I woke up in the bathtub with no shirt, covered in towels holding what appeared to be vanillia pudding mixed with captain morgan.
That ACT prep teacher knew i was hung. I could see it in her eyes.
Just accidentally flashed my junk to the lady helping me try on suits, it was cold in there, I don't think she was impressed.
I'd just like to inform you. That when I was at bvj the first day I was blackout drunk by noon. Get on past Chelsea's level like now. Do it for present Chelsea
Should I go bust a nut on the beach
Randomize
