There's a woman here that looks like a cross between Michael Jackson and Flipper.
After work we went home to fool around. Turns out he had sawdust under his foreskin. I'm never going down on him again.
just throwing this out there: period starts tomorrow sooo either sex tonight or not until tues/weds.
i get a bj anyways so it's really your choice.
k i'll be over in 5.
I feel violated. a guy just did an ultrasound on my balls. He made eye contact..
A 21st bday and NYE should be illegal to have in the same week...
Balls are wasted. Waste are ballsted. Ballsd wasted
I will start puting down the plastic for the vom in our love chamber. If you want to be something or someone else for the night feel free. The theme is shit show.
I'm there.
Send me the picture of my mugshot, my boss got arrested last night and I'm trying to make her feel better.
Jus saw ur date getting a bj in the mcdonalds parking lot...u want anything?
Buffalo PD walked in my bedroom this morning at 7 am. Was still blackout drunk, fully dressed, Steak Out wrapper on the floor, parking meter on the floor of the bar room. 'Both of your doors were wide open, wanted to make sure no one was robbing you.' Then I made a pass at her.
Thanks for the Beyonce article. In other news, I just passed a man with the state of Florida tattooed on his face.
ROB LOWE. SO BEAUTIFUL. SO DOUCHEY. SO HARD TO SPELL HIS NAME WHEN DRUNK.
He just got out of surgery, almost died from shooting him self with an arrow.
I remember that. We went to taco bell looking for pizza.
breakfast this morning: omelette, Valium and baileys hot chocolate
Now that sounds like the breakfast of champions
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