About to do something stupid. You'll be my call. Bring bail money.
Im watching he's just not that into you, eating way too much pizza, and feeling very single.
Sunday was the 8 month anniversary when you shot me in the face...just an FYI.
I'm so prepared to puke on walk of shame tomorrow that I'm putting a toothbrush and toothpaste in my purse the night before. And to think, my dad thought I wouldn't make it in college.
So somebody asked her is she's okay.She turned around,started running and screamed "Ballet is running through my veins" before doing a small pirouette.It's amazing how she managed not to fall.
I have the perfect view of a sexy blonde in yoga pants stretching from the shoulder press machine. I'll be here all night. So glad I came high.
Ur here with me in spirit. Now run free. Run free
You're either a hooker or Beyonce. Beyonce is abnormally good at doing everything in heels
I was talking about you wanting my dick, but that works too
Is he the circus guy or the bi-curious street preacher?
I drank enough to tranq a steed. You really missed out
Easy Mac and you are the sexiest things in my life
I'm serious. I have boob tassles if this is an exchange thing.
I feel like the dump I just dropped is the most successful thing I've done so far today.
I lysoled the money\n(631): wrong text lmao
Jack said he hasn't jerked off in like two weeks and he's like a smoldering volcano who wants to bury you like Pompeii with his man gravy
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