Ha i know. My vag can't go too crazy for a boy halfway across the country. It doesn't have that good of range
and thats when i went through the window and a shard of glass got stuck in my ass. the doctor said it was the best injury hed seen all month. i am a champion of life.
Apparently Chef Boyardee is the only guy I'm taking home tonight.
At what point did I eat out of your mouth?
Walk of Shame today included voting.
Do you think it would be a good idea to mention in my admissions essay that I was the guy that streaked across the soccer field last year?
Yeah like 200 white people came and they are playing that one Biggie Smalls song everyone knows.
I'm eating the rest of the Xmas shrooms and welcoming 2012 by communing with the pine cone.
If you wake up tomorrow and start to wonder.... Yes you did just eat mild sauce from taco bell out of the package while informatively yelling about the loss of my virginity
I have discovered my latent superpower. If a friend is dating a bi chick they will inevitably try and talk me into a threesome.
Grab some lube and condoms and you get a free shirt? College is weird
Hypothetically speaking, when I get a sugar glider would it be frowned upon to bring it Ito classes with me in m pocket?
I found a video of us drunkenly yelling "we wanna be the Pope" as we passed around the blunt
I made a White Russian but saw how early it was and decided to substitute it for milk in my lucky charms. This is what it means to be an adult.
The best part of being a lesbian? If I'm late for work at a hookup's place I can use her make up and peace out. Well and all the sex of course.
Randomize
