I just remembered Dan asking me all polite in the middle of sex "do you mind if I get behind you?" that was the most polite way I've been asked to do it doggy style
whoever says they hate hangovers just doesnt know how to embrace them. i'm eating a mashed potato sandwich and watching grind.
I've decided I'm just gonna keep drinking til the baby bump shows...
idk if you're aware of this...but we could potentially have the greatest hate sex...ever.
the guy was wearing a viagra shirt, i knew what i got myself into.
We came back and there was a shotglass filled with what looks like blood. Come over soon, we're gonna try it out.
It was my little brother's 14th birthday today. Didn't know what to get him so I just showed him how to use incognito tabs on google chrome.
This guy is walking around with a deer head on. Honestly what the fuck
Easter was a success. We had an egg hunt and hid weed and conforms inside them. Cooked a ham, made some jello, got wasted. THIS is adulthood?!
If you get me a sex toy for Christmas everyone in my family will question our relationship.
Would it be totally wrong, that in honor of princess leias death, I role played as her??
I basically go to him for great dick and great memes.
I'm noticing I drink less and do fewer lines when I do both together.
Now that's what I call smart money management.
i cant go to his party cause last time i pressed the red buttons on the wall and the fire alarm went off for 40 minutes, i'm not allowed back there
So, my first week in Saskatchewan ended with me drinking moonshine and getting eaten out in a tractor. I already love it here!
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