i love my job...i have craft hour at my desk w twizzlers
can u grab me a application
Measuring your booze intake in glasses is like measuring Rosie O'Donnell's weight in ounces.
ii just google-imaged 'sad turtle' and maggie gyllenhaal only came up once. what is the world coming to?
my quiz for the book was only 2 questions and my one answer was sorry and then a sad face
someone put bongwater in my humidifier again THIS NEEDS TO STOP
I could get a dump truck for 1000. Think of the possibilities.
no i had to finish in the bathroom to a pic of her mom in a bikini.
drunk her ninja stole one of the pizzas as it arrived and hid all of the pieces in a cereal box in the fridge.Genius.
The thing i'm gunna miss the most about college is peeing while brushing my teeth in the shower without being judged. You just can't do that anywhere else
I just stuck my fingers down her throat so she could puke. I mean what are friends for
Oh my god she just threw up on her dog
I had to wash my hair with conditioner because my sister got hammered and gave the dog a 3am sprinkler bath with my shampoo.
First of all guys don't have walks of shame. Secondly there is nothing more epic than riding the skytrain in a toga while everyone else is going to work
Omg just had weirdest best cab advice situation ever. I kissed the cabbies hand as I was leaving like he was the pope and cried
WAKE UP!!! We have 20 minutes to get to class. That means we only have 10 minutes to get drunk.
But of course I'm in. After all, what fun would the holidays be without trying to find the perfect gift to impress someone you've never met, but need the approval of??
Randomize
