whoever gets the blood i just donated is getting a shit ton of free thc
So I accidentally txted this girl with the same name as the one im seeing, as it turns out shes still dtf
Have u Seen that eharmony commercial where the guy goes " I don't know how I could love her anymore, but tomorrow I will'. Yeah that guy should kill himself
Mother nature decided I wasn't going to be a whore today. Fuck her.
She just licked her nipple in public to get a free bar tab.
Freshmen girls are like potato chips you can't have just one.
I don't think you seem to understand this concept. WHEN A GAY GUY HANDS YOU A DAIQUIRI, YOU DRINK IT.
he got kicked out of the bar for falling asleep on the mechanical bull.. then freaked on us cause we wouldnt go to the strip club with him
She sprained her ankle last night trying to flash me.
just woke up. hair smells like weed and bbq. shins are bruised. vague memory of us chasing deer at the park at 3 am. fill me in on what exactly happened.
I would do everything over again, except the fireball.
Enjoy the penises
I wouldn't be able to live with myself if I blew a Trump supporter.
I told him he looked like my uncle.
Why would you say that in a bathtub?
Double high-fived his wife and her sister on the way out. If I'm not the best mistress ever tell me how.
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