The university put out a message about those missing salt and pepper shakers... You should at least give back 60 of them.
It was like little house on the drunk prairie.
It's Monday. What a great day to start the weekend on the week of st. Patricks day
i've got to stop sleeping with short guys. they always turn into stage 5 clingers
id pay someone 5 dollars to tell me whos house im at right now. comfy couch though
I cant prove it..but im almost positive that you were just outside my window watching me while eating out of a bag of Cheetos...
Its what im here for. Critiquing penis photos.
you threw me on the ground pryed my purse out of my hands screaming " I JUST WANNA HOLD IT A LITTLE BIT". later i found you putting on my lip gloss.
Finally get to put my practical writing degree to use! I'm writing a craigslist ad for a threesome
Cum just came out of my nose. That is all.
He told me he loved me and I told him I shit myself
Sorry about you walking in on the whole nude kinect dancing. The new roomie was drunk and naked and told us he was either over dressed or we were under dressed for the party. And Amy figured it would be easier to join him than it would be to dress him
she was sitting with her tits completely out.. on the kitchen floor..eating pickles by the handful... rapping mac dre... and then lit up a cig and continued...that drunk
I woke up and couldn't find her. She had somehow managed to get into the closet and lock herself in. She was crying for her boyfriend. Thirsty Thursday at its finest
yeah, my mom got it for me because it had animals AND alcohol.
Randomize
