i'm trying to reconcile what i did last night with who i am as a person.
i told him i was gay. he said that gay guys are supposed to be pretty.
Were taking his cast off tonite. Need a saw and a gameplan. Meet us at rosies in 30.
My goal of the day is to not shit myself. That's it. Setting the bar real low
Notice: I will be intoxicated and in your area this evening. To unsubscribe from my sexual solicitation list, reply 'fuck off'.
I am undressing in in n out. They migit ca5l security. Are you provn d6 me?
OH MY GOD. SO PROUD.
There's not an emojicons for I think I ripped my asshole and want to die.
I wish men found my impeccable aim when spitting into the sink attractive.
I'm a wonderful, drunk angel of hydration and sometimes absinthe.
The last time I went to Vegas and the sun started to rise, my copilot went home with her nipples pierced.
please come back they are interrogating me about masturbation
I just took a service station dump so foul I had to buy gas out of guilt
OK... But I need to shower first because I'm covered in stuff I definitely shouldn't have slept in
Sorry I twat blocked you earlier I didn't know Sam was over. But, my house my rules, I don't have to knock before I enter. I did see naked butts and smelt "Sex Stank" in the air, we're going to have to set some ground rules when I get home. Hugs and kisses..Mom
Santa tracker drinking game, you in or what?
Randomize
