what ever happened to devon sawa?
fuck...who knows?
i'm really worried about him.
she kept yelling 'call me bella'
I'm thinking we should try to start remembering stuff we do. Althought I kinda like feeling like Nancy Drew the next morning.
More like the Hardy Boys cause its kinda like a team effort.
At the bar dressed as a taco. not a typo. Come down.
I'm drinking a margarita out of my 'best bj' trophy and it tastes like victory.
i would think by now you'd realize that my penis does whatever the fuck it wants and i have no control over the situation
my purse only fit my wallet or the martini shaker. it wasnt even a question of which i was bringing.
It was like die hard. Except with more penises.
In other more interesting news I'm going to arrange a surprise orgy. You in?
I get hit on by the prison guards every time i go to see him. Seriously.
And I just want you to know I got myself into this mess. I gotta get myself out. Plus, don't you only need one kidney?
Oh, that was the alley that I ate a pine cone in.
No clue what you did last night, sorry. You did hand me a pizza and a mason jar with $1200 in small bills in it when I let you in though.
You left me a note that said "The Earth is blowing up. Bring the Rosé." WTF.
i can feel my liver failing just LOOKING at that thing
Randomize
