Down for casual relationships, more fun than catholic missionary, bring condoms and don't get attached.
Jesus wouldn't steal pop tarts. So why did you?
How do I say "sorry I gave you and your sister herpes" in German?
Please check on her. She announced that Thursday she'd open herself to any veteran so as to thank them for their service. "my services for your service" and left the bar with three numbers.
Don't know how I even got in. I pulled my id out and threw it at the bouncer, and he just picked it up, checked it, and let me in.
he's speaking broken english and calling me isaac.. this is not the australian i ordered for a one nighter
I'm just glad you're the only person I can have a "remember when we thought I was pregnant" conversation with.
This american gymnastics guy.... He just messed up. I feel so bad. I just wanna hug him until he stops crying. Not even in a sexual way. I just wanna hug him.
You know what would make this walk of shame even better? Picking up my cap n gown on the way to my car
That super awesome moment when the guy who threw up in your bed last night crawls into your roommate's bed the next morning...Naked...She was in it.
i only stock magnum condoms so if the guy i bring home doesn't fit in them he only gets to eat me out. no exceptions.
Why is everyone judging me for telling the cat a bedtime story?
Now with the essential back story, I can empathize. Sorry about your beer and butthole.
Do you remember last night?
Just that I fell down a hill with my penis out and the emt talked to me.
I. Love. Skype. Sex.
I think it's just been too long since actual dick has been inside you that you only THINK you love skype sex
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