need another drink. this is the easiest way
All of his creepy stalker friends want you too
I spent a large portion of the night trying unsuccessfully to keep hayley (who was wearing a dress and no underwear) from doing handstands, but yea it was fun. the boys had fun
everything was goin great until he pulled out his ed hardy lighter and smoked in my face like he was cool.
it's like you attract all the douchebags that nobody wants. people should thank you.
I'm fucking him on the second date. I don't give a fuck what Patti Stanger says.
i got really high and listened to the spongebob squarepants theme song and, i swear to god, it was in german.
at last call she tried to get the bartender to fill her flask. when he refused, i had to stop her from trying to pour the rest of her beer in there.
He puked on the grill while the burgers were on. We had to go to taco bell
I figured you left because I was a shit show. Were you still there when I got locked in the bathroom and didn't know where I was? If not, that could have been a dream. I'm still not sure.
"Home for the holidays" isn't clearance to fuck the recently 18 year old high schooler right?
Nope, his last birthday was.
He ate shrooms at 9:30, said, "see you later," and left. I am alone on New Years.
If you come home and I'm pantsless with cake smeared all over my face, I'm sorry.
I am high playing guitar hero naked. Please don't let me die this way
YOU SLEPT WITH A GUY WHO HAS A BILLBOARD IN HIS HONOR?
He broke through his window then signed his name on the biggest peice of glass from it. I think they framed it and named it 'best party ever'
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