It's a miracle Ok Typing texts toYou right now
I looooooove Saturdays!!!!!!!
I am absolutely hammered
Night out in new white coat = success. Offered free breast exams all night, two took me up on it, woke up with one. I love medical school!!!
its preseason football. its like non alcoholic beer. who gives a fuck
Theres a high probability there will be two hot men waiting on you in your bed when you get home for lunch.
trapped on the roof of the strip club. help
Party Liz is going to have to have her wings clipped until someone gets me some baby reins to wear
She was trying to drink out of the beer bong and she thought it didn't work. Little did she know there was no beer in there. Then she got mad at us. Girls.
thank you for extending my knowledge of the effects of vodka. speak of what happened last night and i will kill you and send your fingers to your loved ones.
He sat on me and said I owed him $10, when I asked why he just said "lap dance"
I just woke up naked next to a GetGo sandwich and I can hear my cats are eating my combos. So that's my life.
Just checking to make sure you weren't kidnapped, pregnant or watching Fox News.
I'm sure there's been a weekend in 2014 we were sober... Clearly it wasn't fun, bc I can't recall it. Point proven, alcohol is key.
I took the pregnancy test for shits and giggles, but neither shits nor giggles were had.
Anytime he goes down on me i automatically think of you cheering me on. Your a good friend.
was that you i just saw walking down the street in only one heel smoking a cig yelling "hello sexuals" to everyone who passed??
HELLLLLO SEXUAL BEING
Randomize
