they say Disney World is the happiest place on Earth. It's a close second to the Super 8 on route 18. That place holds some great memories.
Todays outfit involves shorts with embroidered fish. This kids gonna die.
how hairy? two words: wookie tits
On my way, I hope you have alcohol for me to blame stuff on...
so today I found out that she used to be a he....
are you gonna get a divorce?
It was confusing and full of hummus
She asked me to facebook all the girls I'd hooked up with. She started crying when I started my search with A.
I think the waitress doesn't beleive I have friends coming. I've had 4 drinks and a large salad just waiting for you guys.
She came back in her actual cheerleader uniform. Made a bad bj tolerable.
Well idk about you but my nose is all recovered for the weekend.
I was about to send you a concerned-for-your-safety text b/c it took you more than ten seconds to respond to a text that mentioned both the bar and lesbians
So I was bartending last night and this guy w/ his gf said that he recognized me, so I asked him, "do you watch a lot of gay porn?"
I had a dream last night that Sam and Dean had to get rid of a murderous ghost haunting an elf on the shelf. I think I'm ready for Christmas to be over.
New fact of life: getting Becca high never helps any situation at all ever.
Sooooooo this guy just asked me if I'd be interested in a threesome... I'm considering bc I would get to hang out with his dog afterwards.
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