mark tries to be a total badass to make up for the fact that he's a poor man's pete wentz
Woke up on the floor with my glow stick in one hand & dollar bills in the other. Good. Morning.
After we fucked, her eye wouldn't stopped twitching and she could only move her hand, which she used to put her number in my phone
if you need to find her look her up on www.imastupidslut.org
.org?
yeah. they're non profit. helps them sleep at night.
We smoked a bowl, ate popcorn, and watched her lava lamp for an hour. it was a quality bonding experience
Come out Saturday. It's for my lesbian daughter from the future birthday.
We went to Denny's and he threatened to fight an entire high school track team by himself
I told him to just roll me a blunt and put it in a heart shaped box.
Well puke fest 2014 just happened
I'm beginning a new chapter of my life in which our fridge will always be stocked with jello shots. I'm excited to embark down this road to fruity, semi-solid alcoholism.
Congrats you've received dick pics from an Olympic silver medalist
First. I had the strength. Now. I am the death.
I know you told me I shouldn't go see him...that's why I'm texting you letting you know I made it home safe from his house this morning
I woke up with a pillow, shampoo and a plant in my fridge. Eggs in the toilet, and I was wearing three pairs of girls underwear. What happened last night
Had a dick customer and the words "eat my ass" slipped out. He proceeded to lick his lips and say present it. I think it's time I quit.
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