don't leave me alone with all the disney princess sluts
so sad. i just ate the last good 'n' plenty out of the bottom of my purse.
My mom just told me to make sure my face isn't on the front cover of the newspaper on 4/21. Challenge accepted
ATTENTION ALL CONTESTANTS OF SLUTFEST 2012 ; not only will we be judging on how many penis you have sucked but also girth and length will be calculated. If you are found lying you will be disqualified. Remember your fellow participants will be rendering the same services to probably the same people. So choose wisely and let the games begin!
If I believed in "responsibility" and "having limits", I would probably say I consumed too much alcohol in the last 48 hours
No he exists. Who else tells me no matter how drunk I am to pull out. He's watching over me so my bastard doesn't get created.
Nothing like playing hide and seek with a state patrol officer early in the morning to get your heart rate up.
I feel like I shouldn't have to explain to you why giving your cat weed was a bad idea.
There's a chance I told a cop that I was ready for him to strip I may have even taken some ones out of my purse and stuck them in his holster
I gave them the 'I used to fuck your son' discount.
This bird just went for my eyes. Does he think I'm dead???
I literally have a pirate chest of slutty clothing.
Oh my God it's like my cock was dipped in lava
Come cuddle! I'll be passed out somewhere in the library. It'll be like a scavenger hunt!
You laid on the floor and pet their rug. and then demanded Voss water.
Randomize
