Her "get-your-paper-done-early-blowjob" incentive is the thing that has successfully deterred my procrastination
I can always tell its time to do laundry when my vibrator doesn't stay covered up in my sock drawer.
You were doing karaoke. Then you screamed "SHOUTOUT TO ADAM LAMBERT" and started making out with the very surprised looking guy next to you.
He asked me if we could throw a lingerie party together so I guess he's single again
370HSSV 0773H read that upside down
what are you doing with your life
Your drinking has interfered with your drinking. I bet you could get a scholarship to a rehab. Thats pro-level
Driving by his house every hour is not stalking, it's a reconnaissance mission... How else can I confront him
There is a guy in class using a wine bottle as a water bottle. Welcome to the Faculty of Environment.
I just imagined myself as R2-D2 and you as C3P0 walking around the Vegas desert looking for alcohol
I'll bring your "congrats on finally banging" cookies tomorrow, I'm exhausted.
I feel like I beer bonged a ton of asbestos
7% of guys ive been with can get me off... I did the math!
there were rolls with just one bite out of each one leading to the bedroom. you were laying on the bed naked and yelled 'you did it you followed the bread crumbs!'
so i went to the bathroom and my thong was on sideways... i guess that solves the mystery
fell asleep while jerking off ln. woke up to my hand in my pants and my cat crawling all over me
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