He muttered something about having just washed he sheets, then demanded I give him all my quarters.
Why did I wake up with "How to masturbate" on my youtube search bar?
You told us you forgot how, and started to cry.
it felt like a thousand fairies were licking my balls.
My #1 goal this summer is to get drunk at olive garden
Maybe if i steal enough bar glasses i can justify all the money spent i've spent there
You going to have to be more specific than the night we blew an 8ball off the toilet..
I've been practicing for you. Including stockpiling medical supplies for curing hangovers.
and he should realize what an amazing ex i am for encouraging my best friend to hook up with him
I need to beat up a magician now. BRB.
Again. I'm very sorry I tried to poke your eye out. You've been aware of my inability to aim since day one.
I feel like David Hasselhoff when he's drunk eating that cheeseburger and crying. But with cheesecake.
Dude what is wrong with me. I'm like a strong independent woman and shit.
Cheyanne in woods. Ducks attacked. My toe is bleeding. We are gpsing our way home on foot. No worries
thanks for letting me have sex in your bed, too bad you didn't get to yet
who are you?
this kid sitting diagonally in front of me is searching "cheap bongs" on google. hahahhaaha. who does this kid think he is?
Randomize
