are we going to glenview for practice??
(3 hrs later) aids
where r u? what is story? im way too high right now
I would blow Magic Johnson for a pack of lucky strikes right now. Post-hiv.
Dude, she knew her leg was on fire and she kept dancing. Bad-fucking-ass.
You talked to that cop for like 15 minutes and when you got back, you told us you were "networking".
Dude, the cops never think it's as funny as you do.
You need to get over here. I think the drunks are about to sacrifice a chicken to the beer gods. Or a freshman. Stay tuned.
What can I say? I like my food like I like my women, not entirely fucked by our contemporary world.
pretty sure the dicks i sucked were punishment enough
If by some world ending natural disaster I get into an actual relationship with this kid, should I tell him the truth about the web of lies I've based our current relationship on?
Pornhub is still operational. Therefore, the world has NOT come to an end in the blizzard!
I just sent a dick pic to a number on Craigslist, this may be my new low
She was on top, but I lost her at "alright, you look like predator."
I feel a blackout coming on
Plz don't have me burst into your house saying you're late for re airport to rescue you from a fat girl again
That was 2 times
Stacy was in the bathroom puking, so he peed out the window. We were eight stories up.
Idk, apparently drinking five Four Loko's and trying to fight a mailbox constitutes disorderly conduct.
Randomize
