So theres a slight possibility i may not graduate according to planned because i was out getting laid instead of studying. And im okay with that.
She's a squirter....that makes up for lots of other annoying things
You tried to sled down the middle of the street. In. Your. Coat. Of course you are bruised.
My lab manual has instructions for making home wine. Room project?
There is a mirror in the headboard of the bed that I'm sleeping in so I can immediately question life choices when I wake up.
Yeah got a self inflicted broken nose.
I'd like to be considered more than just his fuck buddy thanks. IVE BEEN RISKING PREGNANCY FOR SEVEN GODDAMN MONTHS I DESERVE THE TITLE OF GIRLFRIEND
Hey since its national brother week is that eiffel tower option with your girlfriend still on the table?
I'm having Vietnam flashbacks. This Kid I hooked up with is speaking in class and I keep experiencing the terror.
And after that you guys started calling arbor mist "breakfast juice"
At least your night didn't end with three cops seeing your ass and you sitting on the ground in a wig throwing your shoes at people
Names, who you're caught in bed with, both minor details
His flight is delayed. Mother Nature is delaying me from sex.
Fucking shoot me with this y'all shit. You were in Texas for 2months you do not have an accent Madonna
Is "You've never made me cum." an acceptable breakup line?
Randomize