dude, i woke up naked in her front yard...apparently i tried to leave in the middle of the night, forgot my clothes and decided,"oh heres a nice patch of grass to sleep on" I think god is up there laughing at me.
Leave Me Alone
At least least me cry on your voice mail
There's guys at my school running around throwing potatoes shouting "remember the famine." makes me proud to be Irish.
it's kind of nice to have a picture of me making out with someone and actually know who it is for once
I just realized i came back home with my lei that one night. How do i forget my bra but remember my lei?
He keeps asking me for girl advice, i told him im an expert at getting drunk, not girls
Why did 20 jello shots in a row sound like a good idea last night?
... why is there a bottle of pee on my headboard?
Some days you just pee in a stairwell and go home.
I'm a hopeless romantic that likes rough sex. Judge me
Pretty sure the waitress here is concerned about well being bc I've been here drinking by myself for 3 hours. If only I could show here FB so she'd know I'm not alone...
I'm like a saiyan, every time I get trashed I come back stronger
I'm giving drunk me full control of my body for the next few days. Please don't let me die.
My trash can is full of used condoms and girl scout cookie boxes.
No I dont want him to bring his twin brother, cause then ill have to entertain him with my vagina
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