***** fucked a guy with one hand last night
Partly cloudy chance of praying to the porcelin gods
Is it a problem that I find my wife's 16 year old niece sexy?
i've never seen someone fall down the steps so gracefully... i think im in love
swear to god some girl just crawled out of the washing machine. this is intense.
One of my students just said I have "big mommy parts". Even third graders know that my tits are too big. God I love em.
He booked us a hotel at a resort in cancun for sprng break... I just wanted to get laid this weekend when i was blackout i didnt know it was gonna spiral into a mess of events like a 5 month in advance commitment
Remind me again why a vodka watermelon can't be a thanksgiving dish
It's that "make a Pringle and Twinkie sandwich" kind of depression.
I just walked in on my sixteen year old sister soaking her tampon in vodka. I go to Berkeley. And they think she's the good daughter.
took some adderal to make my alochol withdrawl less shitty. now im just concentrating on how badly i need a drink
I'm remembering the time we thought it was a brilliant idea to put koolaid powder in shots of goldschlager
In bathroom. Hand in air with cell phone. Help.
I don't think I bit anyone but I woke up to scrapes knees, bruises and new friends.
thanks for not wanting to stay all night or talk or anything, nice to have a fuck buddy who really doesnt take the buddy part serious
I'm all about the fuck
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