Afterall, it is the real San Francisco treat
You supply the liquor and I'll "accidently" forget my bathing suit.
Deal!
I puked in the cab and in my hair and he didnt even know
she did the YMCA with her lgs... i think she forgot she wasnt wearing any underwear
We are going out Saturday. Oh and we might also be jousting on bikes.
Ummm. I just wanna say this now: Don't let me invite the band back to the apartment to see my stripper pole.
I miss your penis. I'm telling you this as a friend, like its just a really great penis. You should be proud of it.
Lmao the neighbor heard yall last night She wanted me to tell you way to finish strong
I was lying there too hungover to move when my dog jumped onto my bed and set half a calzone on my pillow. Best. Dog. Ever.
HURRY. I NEED DRUNK. MORE DRUNK.
I just want school to he over so we can build a big tent, do drugs inside it, and watch cartoons until the sun comes up.
That's all I've ever wanted.
Just saw a government minister puke and rally.
Are you feeling better yet?
I need a nap and a new butthole
He told me he was my brother roommate in college after we fucked, but already knew that so I had pretend I didn't know that.. like how I pretended I finished. 2/10
Add tweezing eyebrows to the list of things not to do while on adderol....
Randomize
