I just ate a drumstick out of the garbage. I need a life coach.
rainy day on campus = new personal fetish for girls in booty shorts and colorful rain boots
Fun fact of the day the average american will consume 13248 beers in their lifetime.
So for us it's double that?
Precisely.
The guy in the cast riped the tap off the keg and hit steve with it
I wish dancing around my house in my bra and underwear to Love Shack whilst eating strawberry cake batter was an acceptable form of exercise.
I want a calm night. Not one where I wake up to you topless and bloody.
Juss got out of jail; shes still in there tryin to sing her abc's backwards bc the cops neva asked her too... Whebever she gets to t she starts singin the tequilla song
By getting lucky do you mean I get one of your incredible BJs or you not killing me by the end of dinner?
Well my sober pact lasted almost an hour. Then I did four shots. But in other news, one of those shots I took with a midget. So like I couldn't turn that shit down.
Just follow the currents of life. And if they take me on to a guys dick, so be it.
Our host-mom was rubbing her back sympathetically going "muy bien, chica" while she puked on the beach. So yeah, I think we got the best one.
We fucked to Bonnie Tyler in my car. He's the one.
I forgot what I was gonna say, but I'm pretty excited to not be pregnant.
that lady just saw me taking a picture of her baby... It's time to leave.
her and her boyfriend kept giving me coke ad kissing me talking about my awesome boobs
Randomize