My key broke off while I was turning the key. I can't pull the broken key out. Not only am i locked outside, so is the rest of the building.
We didn't go..parents came home with patron wanting to play drinking games --we asked no questions
how many princess gummy vitamins will it take to negate last nights drinking binge?
96 perecent sure i just took a shower with socks
i just realized that im half way to my goal of puking in every single toilet on our floor
No one knows who he is but he hasn't missed a shot in beer pong yet. He's dressed as lance armstrong and is tearing shit up.
he also begged me to fake an orgasm when he couldn't get me to come.
I thought stuff was gonna go really bad after he filled the super-soaker with kerosene. but it all turned out pretty well.
Our innocent game of 'Duck, duck, booze.' ended up not being so innocent
Bathroom attendant appreciated that hug I have him as a tip. Fucking BROKE these days.
I don't even care that his girlfriend will be there. Us hooking up is a tradition and she will NOT ruin it.
Broeke and glass. I feel so and. Appilogixe in morbing.
Called my house today and my 10 year old brother answered and asked if I was still in jail
Bouncer came into the bathrooms to tell us the old one-person-per-stall rule, realised it was two girls banging, and left us to it. Lesbiperks.
I’m a lady. I promise I won’t oogle your junk when we go skinny dipping.
Randomize
