We can make salsa ya know, maybe even some hot sauce. That doesn't mean we're married.
operation harelip BJ is a go
There's an old bald Japanese dude on the metra next to me. He's drinking MGD on a crowded train, and rocking out way too hard to what may be the same Dallas Green song I'm listening to. Life is sweet.
I'm pretty sure I'm almost gay. Like, I'd do it if I had no choice. Like, if i were in prison I'd try it.
Over it. He probably jacked off to bible verses last night. I don't want that
I think I should become a real estate agent in th friend zone I know the place so well
Awesome morning. I just met my boyfriend's wife, should I have shaken her hand or was the hug a tad over the top?
CONGRATS VODKA, YOU WON RHIS TIME..
No it was after you showed us his fraternaty letters shaven out of your pubes
He was going down on me as I discovered a spaghetti-O on my boob. Its been a while since I faked it.
When I left you, you were walking into a room with a half naked girl. When I returned 2 minutes later, you were locked out of the room naked and she was screaming obscenities from inside. How do you manage to make every girl hat you?
It's like the sisterhood of the traveling vaginas over here
i decided if i had to, i could survive with only 3 fingers on each hand.
last night we were hooking up when all the sudden he just murmured "mm blonde". i don't know what to think about this situation.
We just took an Eskimo family picture.. It's pretty cute honestly
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