guess who just got paired up at the beer pong table with the fat girl who's nipples are hanging out...
I can't, I'm busy. I've been walking around Tokyo on google maps for an hour.
i knew i liked her after she chugged tequila, fell down the stairs and said "oh dont worry i knew it'd be faster this way"
Sorry the STD update turned into an attempt at a bootycall, but at least we both know we're clean now
But theres a keg here and me gusta
I had to convince someone last night that the fact that he couldn't get me off wasn't him it was me and to clarify I had to tell him there was only. One person that got me off every time without fail, he said "that guy is my hero" you should be proud
Do you think he feels stupid trying to bang girls with his small penis? I'd be embarrassed.
I feel like I should be doing a victory lap around my house to the rocky music, or zapping and smiting people with my mystic wizard powers
she's just been through a whole lot lately. When the crazy starts leaking out we give her vodka and lock her in the room with all the pillows.
so that's what that room is for...
The date officially concluded on the phrase "Nosh dat vag".
You blew him?!?!
*Am blowing
And I keep taking breaks to write you back, please stop replying.
Those thigh tattoos deserve the handsomest of grins between them. Dont settle.
I'm jealous, curious, and aroused. All at the same time.
My job here is done.
Best part though was when he wanted to cuddle and I was like, I'm going to go.
Never in my life did I expect to see Eric's mom in a cheerleader outfit along with other women
Randomize
