Ask me how many people I've slept with. Because its changed since I last saw you.
I saw you 20 MINUTES AGO. You need to stop this.
I'm retiring my vagina. Better yet I'm Farve-ing it.
Def the best call fo sho
That way it can come out of retirement anytime and play for different teams. And it can wear Wranglers.
"reccomended dose" hasn't been in my vocabulary for quite some time.
The lack of respect you have for your penis baffles me. I'd rather rub my ball sack on public toilet seats than stick my dick in some of those girls.
A simple 'no' would have sufficed
Jenna and Ryan are ranting and raving about child custody. MY VASECTOMY SMILES.
Disregard that. She just puked into her boot and started screaming.
In case any of you were wondering, kyle is alive. He also intends to do the same thing tommorow night and the night after.Goodnight everyone
come help me. im curled up in the fetal position on the upper floor of the lib. please bring more caffeine or alcohol
its ok. its hell week the lib is a no judgment zone right now
we're going to the olympic park to run the 100m yeaaaahhh
it's 3am. Nothing could possibly go wrong here.
These people don't understand my stages of drunk
just texted my dealer that i could taste the blue but not the cheese. i said i could taste blue.
So apparently they remodeled our middle school. Looks like we'll need to find a new roof to play beer pong on this summer.
Thinking of someone think of me while masturbating while I masturbate. & that's how the over thinkers do it ✌️
While I'm here in reality dreaming of catching chili cheese fries with my mouth out of t shirt guns like Jesus is real
Dude, the worst part is I can't even pretend it didn't happen because she posted a video of it on Facebook.
Randomize
