But honestly u used to be a cool guy and lately uve been superame(734): Superlame
i know we just met, but i forget your name, and i'm wondering why my penis burns?
Don't you think facebook is a bit pretentious, suggesting friends and all? No facebook, I would NOT like to be friends with a girl whose fiancee I have slept with.
i just used the Cadillac of toilet papers. For a minute i actually forgot i was even wiping my ass....i thought i was floating butt first into heaven
Just ate cheeseit crumbs off the floor. i feel like Kirstie Alley.
Well at least he stopped keeping track of money by bottles of McCormick.
I'm reciting my presentation (beer in hand) on the porch to a snowmen audience.
I just found like 5 packs of sparklers. If someone doesn't get set on fire tonight I am retiring from party hosting.
And after getting thrown out of the frat house, getting carried up the hill for a half an hour, puking 5 times, and almost getting stopped by campus security, she still insisted he sleep with her. Gotta give her credit, even blacked she kept her eyes on the prize
But he's not just anonymous male genitalia anymore. I've met him, I've seen his face.
How does she have a hairless cat and a husband it's not fair. Both are hard to come by
I just opened a pickle jar stoned as fuck. I clapped for myself. I feel like wonder woman.
I may have had several rum punches and then gone to the store and used European cucumbers to prove my baton twirling prowess.
Got arrested last night. My cell mate just added me on Facebook.
hey sweets how's ur crotch today?
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