This chick, for whatever reason, has serious "Leave your wife and kids and also break up her young marriage in order to frolick for a good 2 weeks before I realize that she's just like the rest of them and I made a huge mistake and ruined a lot of lives in the process" potential. It's SO INTRIGUING.
its like he missed a chap in the "being a guy" handbook and read the bible instead
The only pictures he has from one of the biggest football weekends is an album titled "I miss my dog" filled with tons of pictures of his dog and him. This relationship must end.
mind if i send you a dick pic? so you can see what she wasn't doing right?
First roommate to find me and dance with me will live. Battle Royale.
I'm sure it's not the worst thing to ever come out of my ass
The drunk mom in a firefighter hat just told her to leave.
Now I'm obligated to stay and cuddle with her because the condom broke. Fuck.
Also, totally got laid in my yellow rubber boots and it was awesome.
I want to see a guy holding a pizza and a bottle of scotch and a box of magnums. I'm a simple woman.
well, you know. whores of a feather.
Ok you had this coming you put a sponsored filter on a dick pic
So, I found your eyebrow, someone glued it in between my eyebrows so I looked like I had a unibrow when I went to work...
I’ve gone two rounds already this morning and I’m ready for a third. The moon is in the house of sluticus hornius.
Who the fuck puts glitter on their vagina? It’s all over my face and crotch.
Randomize
