Yea went to the bars and he called me 2 hours later with random people saying he is at a place that i don't think exists
how does a 20 year old who hasnt gone through puberty yet score the game winning goal? fuck sidney crosby and his small nuts.
I just realized my mom and I make the same noises when we have sex. Fuck.
I don't know, But i remember him licking ecstasy off my boobs and my boyfriend cheering him on
He puked on the grill while the burgers were on. We had to go to taco bell
As a general rule, drunkenness and gymnastics do not mix.
I was high and he had on a gorilla suit. Of course I had to take a picture with him
Your a disgrace to smokers everywhere
When the nurse referred to my vag as "your downstairs", I knew I found the perfect Doctors office.
It was so small.
Tiny. Got to love sexting. Imagine finding out the old fashioned way.
I just spent 3 hours in the back of an unmarked police cruiser. Best. Date. Ever.
I'm a lady who knows what she wants in life, and that's uncommitted dick.
Just had a threesome with a married couple.
Stop living my dream.
WHY IS THERE A GOLD FISH IN MY BONG??
The room got awkwardly silent right as i yelled "leave him alone! I know plenty of straight guys who like to suck dick!"
I'd invite you over to drink but then I wouldn't be drinking by myself.
Randomize
