this is amy. the small petlike person from the womens bathroom at the reef.
I lost my virginity in that bed. You just layed in history.
counting down the days left of school on my birth control packet.
The only thing I really remember is repeating "I hope I still have a job on Monday". Oh and pulling my boob out of my dress.
So I take it the company Christmas dinner went well then...
It's only been a week and i've already broken my no summer randoms rule twice.
I kinda volunteered your dick to help her deal with her virginity issues. Figured you wouldn't mind.
you told that cab driver that when the 3 of us come togehter it means happiness and love
i need to stop meeting underage girls and letting them into the bar. i mean yea its a surefire way to get laid without having to tell them I'm 26 but i feel like as a bouncer I'm focusing on all the wrong things
My fucking earlobe is bruised what the hell
You keep making the old jokes & I'm gonna come down with a sudden case of low-estrogen related vaginal dryness..
NO BABIES. YOUR VAGINA WILL BLEED WITHIN A FORTNIGHT.
No I'm not high but I did cry for over an hour tonight because I realized that they never made a sequel to "Under the Tuscan Sun" with Diane Lane.
why is half of my head shaved?
How did the test come back?
I've never been so happy to have a yeast infection. And i got a free pack of birth control
Having a bangable neighbor is going to ruin my booty call game. I refuse to go across town for dick now
Randomize
