I totally have a Rabbi on speed dial now. Keep it Kosher.
he said i'm too pretty to suck penis
never have phone sex with a hardcore republican during this health care crisis . just dont.
My landlord doesn't knock anymore when he shows the apt... So i just had sex in front of a family.
didn't stop?
naw, they were rude, not me.
I just remembered I gave $20 to a bum last nite. Philanthropy events always make me do stupid shit.
I was giving him a handjob and he commented that he loved my nailpolish....I'm destined to die a fag hag
I think I just found part of a tooth on my bed... What goes on in here?
i'm already feeling the tequila hangover i'm going to have on friday
Your doorknob is in my back seat, in case you were looking for it.
If you get me so fucked up I can't use the microwave , I'm going to be so mad at you
He threw up the X he took like 30min before then when we thought his antics were over... BOOM! He tried to pee out a light he was holding.
You slid down the bannister into a split. Lines were crossed.
don't mind me. just hanging out in this cool air conditioned Babies R Us until the liquor store next door opens.
He was bigger soft than my ex was hard. A gold medal rebound.
I think you might be the first man ever to describe getting a blowjob as "neat"
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