I wish life had little blips of pornography
that sweater is a total boner killer. you might as well be wearing a wedding dress.
he aimed his bare ass at the sparkler, farted, and it really did work...i love 4th of july anal fire works
I woke up and someone had put toast at my feet. I was SO. HAPPY.
Just calculated that for my last final tomorrow I need 120% to improve my grade and 53% to keep it..buying 30 packs now, go get dressed
It's like I'm in a vicious cycle of noncommittal penis.
no im not bringing booze its easy, you just challenge a drunk guy to beer pong, he'll hand you two beers, you lose on purpose, and everyone makes fun of you. but we laugh in the end for bringing nothing to a byob
Do you think making a dress out of an "Open" flag that my friend stole from a bar, and wearing it out sends the wrong message? ....Or exactly the right message?
Being the only woman in a triathlon group - it's a penis paradise.
At what part of the night did you guys leave?
After my hot tub cannonball.
Also, I don't know if it's the drugs I'm on or not, but I truly believe I was hypnotized last night listening to an audio book.
so an orgy is about to happen in the next room if you wondered where i am currently at in life
No one wants to start their day off with bloody lemons and a tampon in the toilet. Wtf.
I finally got my restraining order in the mail. Was that supposed to upset me? I'm just over here like "TELLEM BOY BYE!-\nlegally..."
With a word you would own me. At your command I would walk to your house completely naked.
Randomize
