she wants me to text her or call her all the time when we are apart...this is not high school...
I woke up in his bed wearing nothing but my underwear and it was on backwards and my entire body is too sore to move...
Im glad someone is finally more of a drunken slut than I am.
There's a hand-carved wooden bong in my backpack, and i really wish i could remember last night now.
I'm pregnant.
The fact that this number is not in my contacts is giving me hope it's a wrong number???
I can pinpoint my loss of innocence as the moment I started masturbating with my teddy bears
New brilliant plan: invite two random okcupid girls to the same bar at the same time, have them compete
Had a turkey baster with clean pee in it in my pants to pass a drug test, and the bottom fell off, so yeah I'm pretty pissed.
Do I go to spinning class and try to redeem myself from going drunk, or do I wait a week and hope they forget I fell of the bike?
Does he know you were at a strip club taking shots of tequila right before you babysat his son?
I just matched with a taco on tinder. Dreams come true.
We were covered in sweat and glitter, making out onstage, in front of everyone. I think it was a good night.
For 15 minutes straight, he literally did every accent there was, from Russian to Bostonian. The issue: no one could determine whether he was sober, wasted, or anywhere in between
Nana added me on facebook...i think i'll have to call her and warn her about my lifestyle before i confirm her as a friend.
um care to explain the stolen chinchila under greg's bed..i'd be fine with it if it wasnt chewing up the stash
I’ll call you in a minute. Trying to book an AirBnB so I can finally bang the yummy guy from yoga
Your downward dog is going to rock his cock. I’m jealous
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