New plan, instead of sleeping with her, I'm just going to use her to sleep with the entire sorority.
The camp director doesn't care if we drink and i'm running the rifle range. Someone is going to get sued.
I'm a 23 year old virgin. I've masturbated in ways you can't even imagine.
I just discovered cum stains from two different guys on my wall. I don't know whether to be proud or horrified.
I have to overdose on valtrex I had a rough weekend.
Just don't let me fall on anything that can be broken. Unless its a dick
Sorry if this is weird, but please don't have sex in my truck. I get to be the first...
All you have to do is speak. Your voice reverberates strait to my vagina.
I love being high. The owl outside stopped who-ing and I could swear I just heard someone say, "Okay, that's a wrap!"
friends are allowed to bang on New Years, I read it on the Internet somewhere.
The best thing about this time of year is that all I have to do is add a random mardi gras decoration to my cart full of alcohol and boom, no more judging
are you still up? I want to use you for sexual things. you have 35 minutes to respond to this offer.
So I decided to sleep with him for the first time in months so I can convince him it's his kid instead of the other guy
I really need to stop having sex.. I haven't been able to get a brush through the back of my hair for a good week and a half
i think i puked but i couldve been a dream and i may have madeout with a 20 something guy infront of my managers...also possible dream.
Randomize
