your horoscope this morning...very interesting...good luck today
ha. weirdest feeling ever. just wiped my ass with my non-dominant hand. (eating cheeseburger with right one)
Your grandmother is in heaven weeping.
Where you at
assisting at a photo shoot in williamsburg till 7ish. wassup?
Doesn't matter. I already jerked off in your bed.
his mom walked in while I was blowing him. he turned around in panic and accidentally punched me in the face. i have a black eye and only half the clothes i came here in. can you give me a ride?
when she said she would show you her other bow, she ment she wanted you to bend her over and see the tattoo on her lower back you idiot
bringing a ziploc bag full of Jim Beam to the movies may not have been the best idea.
How do I tell my Dad that in the picture he has of me and my brother as the background of his phone we were both rolling face on ecstasy?
That's the first time I've ever heard something that tickled both my gag reflex and my penis simultaneously.
I gasped. Both pairs of lips did.
I am in his childhood bedroom and I feel like his trophies are applauding me and his stuffed bunny is disgusted with me. Did you know he was a mathlete?
So not the biggest tits he had his cock between. He could have lied.
See! Theres potential!
Oh yeah. All good relationships start with a threesome.
I told him that I wanted his dick like I wanted a jumbo hot dog. There something wrong with my priorities
Please don't try and hook up with one of your high school teacher's friends
What am I thankful for..I figured out I can drink on antibiotics without getting sick thanks to the power of pot gummies
Randomize
