we're blogging at a bar
i've got a dick and you've got a pussy....what is the problem??
um. i met him on myspace...we text now, he lives down the street
So...AT&T finally added picture messaging for iPhone...bring on the tits!!!
I just used a tire swing as a toilet. I think I'm gonna pass out here so I can see the look on the first kid who uses it in the morning.
I got fingered by sexual harassment panda last night, by a van, I can't remember if he took off his furry panda hands...
You always know it is going to end badly when a guy asks if he met you at a "coed naked lawn bowling party"
She's the perfect storm when it comes to psycho stalkers
You just kept shouting "I AM AN ADULT!" until he agreed to carry you home on his shoulders.
But today feels so special with katie getting herpes and me cleaning my room. Good things are happening.
Yes... I'll kill two birds with one crazy ecstacy filled night.
My rule for unemployment is that I can't smoke before noon.
I haven't gotten up before 1 though, so it hasn't really impacted me.
My vibrator box just fell off the table and hit my cat in the head, he is a little stunned. Good thing I went medium size
There's a burrito next to my bed. Did you buy it for me or is the Chipotle fairy real? And why am I naked?
and then you proceeded to throw soup at him for calling you a bitch...a CAN of soup...
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