i was so worried that when his hands were down my pants he was going to find the weed i stole from him
I'm watching i used to be fat. I've been doing crunches for the last half hour yelling at the slut on tv to stop crying and do crunches.
Just living on dreams and a bed of used condoms
I think the solution to your phobia is an open relationship with your dildo. about the same responsibility as a pet rock
I went in the closet and cried, then the bathroom and cried, and lastly he showed me his penis and I cried. It was a weird night.
Just ate a gummy bear I found in my sheets. So yeah, 2013 is SO gonna be my year.
You know you were way drunk when you wake up at 7 AM halfway on a couch, tangled in a sheet with your shoes still on.
I encourage you to ignore feeling. Drinking more helps
My sexual preferences tend to require a degree in psychology to understand
When I woke up this morning I swear my mouth tasted like dick and rolaids.
Dude I love you. So much. Thank u. I'm safea. In allysi lns car. Mine towed. If u loved me ud leand me 500 in the morning. Sleep on it nd let me know.
i bet he makes cat noises to excite himself.
im on a boat
How did you get this number?
You let the ASEXUAL teach sex Ed?!
It was like Strip poker and blow, but with Yu-Gi-Oh cards
Randomize
