Nevermine. I'm just going to tell you on Myspace with a glitter graphic.
My toast was "here's to being positive, and testing negative... Cheers!"... after that chick gagged on her shot, everyone knew.... slut.
$22.99 left in the bank til payday = 3($7 jack & coke) + 2($0.89 T-Bell taco) + $0.21 in case of emergency.
math is fun
A very small part of me wants you to appreciate me for more than just my breasts. But the rest of me is breasts.
he has a puerto rico area code and says his name is johnny cash. extremely suspect
quick, send me a pic of a fat chick eating ice cream in a bikini. no joke, no questions, just do it.
My vagina is trying to run away to Boston without me.
struggle bus is officially taking me on a road trip to hell. If this is just the first destination, I'll jump out the fucking window.
i just honestly didn't believe you when you said your brother was a fucking clown. ho shit you weren't kidding.
apparently when a guy says "if there's anything missing in your life, I will provide" he's not expecting attractive lesbians to be the answer.
I blew him while the canoe was sinking...I think of it as the better version of the titanic
I got with him in my watermelon costume so ya you owe me $1
my god I love twenty year old dicks
Tonight I'm getting fucked up for America because Lord knows we need it.
I'm still drunk dear. I just woke up 3 feet from the front door with 20 dollars worth of taco bell in my hands.
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