Wanna demo a makeout? Check box yes or no. Or maybe. Okay bye.
tod's in jail
he was afraid of holiday checkpoints so we let him ride my mom's tandem bike home. by himself. at 4 am.
what i wouldnt give for a night at orourkes without seeing 3+people ive slept with
tonight is proof that a xbox 360 will always be more reliable than a girl ever will
and a girl gets the red ring of death every month
no, i swear. she uses a huge jagermeister flag as a sheet on her bed.
She refused to give me a hand job while we were watching a war movie saying she didn't wanna disrespect the soldiers
Howd you meet this guy?
I found him next to my pants on sunday morn.
I would have to gauge my vagina to make it fit.
This would be a good time for the don't get drunk and bang a married chick pep talk...
Until you can top getting paid to have women tell you to check out their ass, my job will remain better than yours
So far I've taken two naps, went out and bought a pizza called the Hipster, and in 15 min I'm gonna make a snow angel. Conquering Snowlandia. How bout you?
Just got road head. In broad daylight. On the interstate. During rush hour. Pushing the envelope one public bj at a time.
You're emotionally mature, right? I said you were.
I have at least four things in my line of sight that have Kermit the Frog on them in my dorm. Does that answer your question?
you said you heard a baby, so i told you to go feed it. you came back 2 hours later with a pizza and when i asked you where the baby went you pointed to the pizza and puked.
Greetings from Florida; the armpit of the US, where my 240something lb brother nearly got carried away by some aggressive woodland mosquitoes. I was only spared because they could probably sense I was currently semi-disassociating and would not feel the suffering their presence wrought.
Anyway, how was your day?
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