If last night was a website it would be called poordecisions.com OR uncircumcisedspanishweiner.org
..now you can marry chaz and be in cher's family..
yeah n i dont have to pretend to be into chicks to do it now...
walkin home..,.jsut saw the cheshire cat
watch out for the queen of hearts
fuucck i forgot ab her
they ran out of cups so I just drank out of a cowbell.
overheard a conversation between 2 lesbians: 'back when I used to have dick sex...' oh, vegas, I so heart you
What did you wear last night? Because I'm pretty sure there are atleast 4 Facebook statuses about your walk of shame.
She got a text from her mom saying "you better not sleep with him, we all know how he is". IV ONLY BEEN HERE A WEEK
Came to from my blackout with native american warrior facepaint on I'm too old for this shit
The facepaint not the blacking out
He calls it "his noble steed" and i plan to ride it.
she brought my homemade cookies with condoms taped to the box... im in love
Whatever I'm getting wasted, my costume's bomb, and there's a good chance I'm getting laid. Not letting stupidity ruin my night!
IM TRYING TO SAY GOODNIGHT STOP FOR LIKE FIVE SECONDS WITH THE DICK SUCKING
I just had sex with the Sheriff's Deputy. You should call me.
He called my vagina his wife... how is that NOT creepy?!
I woke up naked in a tent. I was more upset that the air mattress had deflated.
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