I think you should know he took my pants (buttons and zippers included) and my thong off with his mouth alone. I found my husband
just took my exes job. there should be an award for how many times I've managed to fuck that girl's life
can i drink enough to forget this semester even happened?
I feel like I've been slapped by Gods icy cold dick of vengeance.
the fda needs to get their shit together cause these four loko going away parties are gonna kill me
Cause I came home. Im covered in green marker and jack daniels. Theres a taco and the words "we went to Mexico" on my wrist. Im a walking abomination.
Just left the frat house in last nights clothes minus my earings, shoes, underware, tequilla cap, and my dignity. If you see me on your way home just hit me
googling pictures of Lindsey Lohan so that I know what to wear to court is definitely a low point in my life
We lost our room key and found it in his pocket with 3 pieces of fish.
Oddly enough I feel totally fine now. Clonazapam and red bull the breakfast of champions.
In all honesty the person most likely to secretly slip me drugs would be ... Me
Also day 6: dick is healed and ready to go back to work.
I got my period today and I cried tears of joy. And then just cried because my cramps are actually killing me from the inside out.
My 1st STD. I feel like there should be a cake for this.
I'm bleeding and intoxicated as I'm walking to my final right now. Wish me luck
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