she was so ugly that the sight of her made me shiver and then i had to play it off like a draft blew by that only i felt.
I'm looking at pot farms on google earth. Google should be proud I found a real purpose for it to serve.
I didn't mean to leave you there I just didn't know him well enough to throw up in his bathroom.
The slutty girl scout law, revised for halloween 10: on my honor i will try, to serve my vagina and my shot glass. To hold back friends hair at all voming moments and to live by the sluttly girl scout law.
test run with donkey pinata disastrous. broken glass and tequila EVERYWHERE
I just keep sniffing it hoping for an explanation.
Every grown women needs to pee herself once in her life. It builds character.
Just got 20% off at the liquor store. How you ask? I asked if there was an "I got divorced today" discount.
I am the prescription. I can be taken orally or vaginally and in any dosage. This is why I went to med school.
Dude I am allergic to the candy dicks from that sex shop in Vegas. Come take me to hospital right now.
You put me in such a good mood with that road head, I bought everyone at Hooters donuts.
This snow needs to melt so I can get wasted on someones front lawn
UPDATE: THERE IS ASS EATING. I REPEAT: THERE IS ASS EATING.
hey, just so we're clear, next time we go swimming drunk at my house, we have to use the floating chairs instead of my mattress. i'm not sure how to get it out of the pool.
i havent showered for 4 days and i just made my dog smell my arm pit. also, im stoned.
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