i just caught my roommate coming out of the bathroom half naked with a surge protector. he told me he didn't wanna talk about it.
dpoing straight shots of jhameson. boys are imp ressed. i apologize
he is a creepy guy.
yea thats what heroine does to ppl.
Well, I'm eating cake, watching wedding videos of people I don't know, and crying. Clearly I'm a vision of mental health today
I feel the need to clarify that I did not show her my vagina.
They figured our he was high when he told the manager he wanted a break to go wrap his dick in toliet paper and pretend it was a ghost.
You did it first. I was merely expressing my support for you, by pressing my testicles against a window.
YOU LET ME GO HOME WITH CREEPY RON JEREMY?!?
...and?
I hate when you're right.
Do you still have "be bumpin" written on your ass in glitter pen? Who brings a glitter pen to a bar? Or pulls there ass out for that matter...
You said you were uncomfortable with your body and then you started making whale noises
It was at the same house, but a different party, when lesbians set me on fire. So there's that.
this is honestly why we're friends. we drink tea and plan to do drugs together.
I don't want to inconvenience you with my dick\n\n
Last night was fun but it wasn't right. I will say that our lives intersected for a brief and intense moment and we will just leave it there.
His nipple licking is glorious
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