Rescue me. My white trash great uncle just pulled out his belly at the restaurant to show us how big this woman's tit was
Just so you know you don't have to worry about me picking up any guys tonight. The Hilton is hosting guests from the North American Gay Volleyball Association and the Comic Palooza
If this wasn't a work function my tits would be out already.
Is this a genuine concern or are you just high?
JUST BECAUSE I'M HIGH DOESN'T MEAN ITS NOT GENUINE CONCERN.
I'm afraid you are becoming too bourgeois with your switch from boxed wine to bottled.
His exact words were "Can I meet your vagina?" I kept wondering if he was going to try to shake hands with it...
I hooked up with a guy dressed up as morning wood. Needless to say he lived up to his costume.
I wish I had a picture of me and ron helping that stripper lick her own vagina
What am I supposed to say? "Hey remember last spring when I did an ergonomic assessment on your office, well here's an ergo for your dick."
Have you ever been so drunk you pass out in the cab and everyone goes inside and forgets about you? I have
A guy at my table is reading a magazine called "Cheese Connoisseur"
We were fucking in the bedroom then we heard Sports center on in the living room. He stopped midfuck when I started celebrating that my team won over his
Thanks for the hospitality last night.
You mean sex?
Yes....hospitality.
My son's girlfriend just thanked me for having good penis genes.
Don't get yourself off tomorrow. We. Are. Having. Sex. That's that. Just dont do it.
Randomize
