Why did I wake up this morning with 10 tally marks on my hand and a penis drawn on my tits?
all adderall does is make me the grand champion of using wikipedia.
white trash bash was a total success...cops shut it down twice and her hair stayed in rollers all night..she never broke character
Just saw a girl i'm pretty sure is simultaneously jailbait and a milf. I never want to leave mexico.
I spit up blood this morning
That's vegas.
She just took the bottle of jager to the bathroom and locked the door. Now I hear the water running..if the house floods she's paying for it
I've had more sex in the two weeks since we broke up than I ever had in any two weeks we were together.
I'm dealing with this like an adult, cupcakes and beer.
Awee what are you going to name your new dog?
What dog?
Care to explain the single rose and the package of "Cowboy Moustaches" I found on the porch?
YOU CANT FOOL THE TOILET
I feel badly that he has cancer, but this does not mean I am obligated to have sex with him. Again.
That's really the only reason I'm dating you, the prospect that I might get bacon
all I remember the next morning was crawling through the doggy door and finding my underwear in my purse
On this version of “Dean Can’t Be a Normal Fucking Human,” I told a guy I’d shove a tv up his ass. Recreationally.
Plasma, LED or OLED?
Randomize
