she looked like the bat from fern gully.
is it customary for a bride to wear white even if she's a whore? i feel tie-dye would have been more accurate
I think I might stay on campus instead of going home for thanksgiving and see how many townies I can hook up with and no one will be around to judge
I admit it's going to be hard to top a limo orgy and Mcnuggets....but I have faith in you
rolled over to window for cup of snow instead of leaving bed for water. that's how hungover
Fine then. I'll just do all this coke on my own this weekend and die. It'll be strictly your fault.
I can't tell which way is up. Too many corners around his house too. An arbitary assimilation of edges.
Christ, I swear you are the high man's Dr. Seuss.
I fed him pizza in bed. I'm probably the best one night stand ever.
he just hooked up with some chick in a bedroom upstairs so I just went to sleep in the pantry closet...
I've been drinking vodka for the last 12 hours at the beach and can't see straight and have awesome hair.
LIFE IS #1 SOMETIMES
Her boyfriend caught us fucking and said "cool you're cheating too" and left.
You live a charmed life.
your body is your temple. do you really want a bunch of dicks in your temple?
Out of curiosity, do you feel happiness for you, or sadness for ME, that you are the only one I drunk text?
Im just an angry damaged little elf who wanders around and tries to find drugs.
Saw the Peanut butter guy at checkout he had at least 30 containers of it and like 6 different kinds...
Randomize
