S and I had anal without a condom because I'm on my rag but he didn't finish. Should I still take Plan B?
he cracked the bottle of jager at 11am and said "hey, its Saturday and I gotta do something"
There is a keg full of gin. THERE SHOULD NEVER EVER BE A KEG FULL OF GIN.
Even after projectile vomiting watermelon on the beach, it still sounds appetizing.
Do you think my job would send me for a second drug test if i took a whole pumpkin pie to work for lunch tomorrow?
She said we should all be mermaids since didn't breathe for 9 months inside our mothers. I want her logic.
WHY. COME BACK. TRAPPED WITH ROOMMATE AND FALCON. SAVE ME. I HAVE HUMMUS.
I wonder when walk of shame thursdays in the rain will finally make me stop drinking.
He never broke character while fucking me on the neighbor's lawn. I give him a 10 for his dedication to the British accent.
Dude I sat in the corner of the party bobbing my head and singing danger zone
I made out with a guy because he ate a grape lollipop and he tasted delicious... not my proudest moment.
He asked me what I wanted for Christmas. I told him an orgasm would be nice.
We need to catch up immediately. I took ecstasy and made out with carrot face this weekend.
Eaten today: granola bar, pumpkin donut, and fritos. Oh, college nutrition.
Somehow my life has turned in to drug deals at the bar, and illegally camping on a mountain because I have no where else to live.
Randomize